Why Can't You See?
by Emm
Summary: It's a gymshippy... another one! Just angst, angst, angst...
1. Falling

Why Can't You See? - Chapter 1  
  
Disclaimer: Either give me the rights to Pokemon NOW, or the fluffy bunny rabbit gets it! I'm not kidding! I have a water pistol and I'm not afraid to use it! sticks bright pink plastic water gun to head of fluffy blue rabbit toy  
  
Authors Note: This is the first chapter, and unless you haven't guessed, it's Misty's point of view. The second chapter's coming up soon and it's Brock's point of view.  
  
~~  
  
Do you remember what it feels like to fall?  
  
That split second when you realise that you're falling and your heart seems to stop beating, and you can feel the adrenaline rush through your veins. Your heart jumps up into your throat, and time slows down. You feel paralysed, yet your arms fling around wildly for something to cling onto, to save you from the fall.  
  
You realise that you're going to fall, and there's nothing you can do to stop it. Knowing that you can't stop the inevitable, all you can do is try and protect yourself, to cushion the blow. You brace yourself for the   
impact.  
  
When you hit the floor, the shock of the fall has gone. But you are left behind with the humiliation. But most of all, you're left with the pain.  
  
And I have suffered the biggest fall a person can take.  
  
I've been snappy and irritable all day, and to tell you the truth I think that everyone's getting annoyed with me. Like I care anyway. None of them understand what I'm going through. I can't tell anybody anyway, so what's the point in trying to explain myself? And if Ash makes one more 'time of the month' joke, I'm gonna kick him into last Tuesday, I swear.  
  
Sitting on the beach now, I should be happy. It's a beautiful day, the sun is shining, birds are singing.....and *she's* here. That...that...witch! I'll bet you anything that they're cuddling or kissing. They can't keep their hands off each other and it makes me feel sick. I'm not exaggerating, I really do feel ill when they're all over each other like that. I deliberately positioned myself as far away from them as I could get away with. But I don't want them to get suspicious about the real reason I've been so angry recently.  
  
I'm burning to see what they're up too, but I don't want to give him the satisfaction of seeing me look over. After debating with myself over whether or not I should look over, my curiosity finally gets the better of me and I turn my head towards them in a casual manner.  
  
I wish I hadn't.  
  
He's got his arms wrapped around her shoulders in a simple protective manner. She's playing with her hair, twisting it around her perfectly manicured finger and smiling girlishly. They look like the perfect couple.   
Laughing and smiling, totally oblivious to the world around them. I watch him lean in to whisper something in her ear. She giggles and blushes, her cheeks going pink. Grabbing hold of the the hand which circles her   
shoulders, she leans her face towards him, her platinum blond curls falling over her face so I can't see what she's saying. He laughs as if he'd just heard the funniest thing in the world. She giggles again and leans her head on his bare chest. She's so short she has to stand on tiptoe when she wants to kiss him. He glances down at her blond head, an unreadable look in his eyes.  
  
He looks up and his eyes briefly meet mine. My heart skips a beat as I realise I've been caught looking. I can feel my face growing warm and I quickly turn my head away. I can still feel his eyes on me, but there's no   
way I'm going to look back. I choose instead to look towards the azure sea, and I focus enviously on the people which splash happily there. Anything to keep my mind off him. The sea has always comforted me, but today it does nothing. All I can think about is last night, when he introduced his new 'friend'. That was the night I fell, and I fell hard.  
  
It's like having my heart torn out everytime I see them together. It's ironic that the person least likely to ever hurt me is the one who's causing me so much pain. I know I should be happy for him. He's dealt with so much pain and disappointment over the years, and if there is someone more deserving of happiness, I've yet to meet them. But I don't understand why it has to be her. Why can't it be.....me?  
  
I'm not a kid. I understand how the world works, and I know the facts of life. But God, I was so niave! For five years, I walked around with a blindfold covering my eyes, blind to what was right in front of me the whole time. That blindfold was only taken off when it was too late. If only my eyes had been opened sooner. If only I could turn back time. I could go on saying "If only..." forever, but it's not going to change anything. That ship has left, and it's never coming back. I know how the world works. I also know how unfair it can be.  
  
They say that you never know what you've got 'till it's gone. Last night I discovered the truth in those words, and now I am trying to cope with the hurt following the fall. I took him for granted, I know I did. All those years where he'd cook and clean for us. When I was sick, he'd care for me. When I was upset, he'd comfort me. When I was angry, he'd let me take it out on him without a word. I didn't know how good I had it. When I think back over the years, I cannot think of a single time when he insulted me, or critisised me, or raised his voice to me. Not like a certain other person around here.  
  
But when did ever I take a moment to thank him for what he'd done? When did I ever truly appreciate everything he had done for me? When did I show him I cared about him as much as he did about me?  
  
In answer to all those questions, I didn't. Is it any wonder that he ran to another woman? I never showed him how grateful I was, and I never allowed myself to see how much he was to me. And now that I'm finally able to admit to both him and myself, it's too late. My chance has gone and the oppurtunity has passed.  
  
I think a part of me realised how I felt a long time ago. It was screaming at me to show him what I really felt, but the rest of me wouldn't listen. He was Brock, the guy who took rejection after rejection, yet kept bouncing back. He was always there. I never could imagine what it would be like without him there. I guess that I always imagined Brock would be the same, that things wouldn't change. Brock flirts with a woman, I drag him away, Ash laughs. That is the way it's always gone, and I never stopped to think it would ever be any different. But now it is and.....and I don't like it. Why is it that people always desire what they can't have? Life would just be so much easier if things would just go the way you want them too.  
  
But life never is easy, and you can't choose who you love and when you fall in love them. I'm only just learning that. I feel a hand on my shoulder. I look up into Ash's concerned face and raise my eyebrow questioningly.  
  
"Are you ok, Misty?" he asks, crouching down to eye level.  
  
I glare at him defensively. "Of course I'm ok! Why wouldn't I be?" I protest.  
  
Ash looks at me oddly and frowns slightly. "Well, you've been kinda tense since last night. I was just wondering what's up, that's all".  
  
My face softens a little, and I force a small smile onto my face. "I'm fine Ash. Thanks for asking".  
  
He smiles and stands up, preparing to leave. "Well, I'll see you later, I'm gonna head back to the hotel" he grins. "Besides, I know it's your time of the month".  
  
That's it. I'm gonna kill 'im!  
  
"But really, whatever it is that you're upset over, don't worry about it. You'll get over it before long".  
  
I watch his retreating back, and I let his words sink in. "Yeah" I whisper to myself. "I'll get over it".  
  
That's when it dawned on me. Ash had unwittingly given me the best advice a person could give. I sneaked a look back at Brock and his girlfriend. Her real name's Kara, but I personally prefer to call her 'it'. Much to my suprise, I find Brock still staring at me, and she's asleep in his arms. Had he been staring at me the whole time? He's probably wondering why I'm acting so weird today. Fiddling with my bikini strap, I bite my lip and take a deep breath. I manage a small smile at Brock. My confidence starts to grow and the smile turns into a cheerful grin, accompanied by a little wave. He looks slightly shocked, and he has a bewildered look in his eyes. Slowly, he raises his own hand and awkwardly waves back, a look of confusion crossing his face.  
  
I turn my face away, and my cheerful grin disappears as soon as I'm sure he can no longer see my face. I feel my brave resolve start to crumble, and tears start to prick my eyes. Ash was right. I'll get over it, just as I   
would a cold, or... or a fever. I don't know how long it'll take, but it'll pass one day. And like they say, there are plenty more fish in the sea. As much as I'd love it to be me that he was holding like that, and as much as I wish it to be me he loves, it can never happen. I doubt I even had a choice to begin with. He still sees me as a little kid, even now. But I'm not a gawky 11 year old anymore. I'm 16 for crying out loud! I could wish with all my heart that he'd love me, but wishes hardly ever come true. One day it'll go.  
  
I take a deep breath of the sea air, and despite the fact that my heart is heavy, I shake my head to get my hair out of the way. Standing up, I put my hands on my hips and turn to Brock, smiling confidently.  
  
"Well, I'm going for a swim. I'll be back in a bit, ok?" I smile, hoping desperately that he can't hear the waver in my voice.  
  
He stares at me for a few seconds, his eyes piercing right through me. I swallow hard, he's making me more nervous with each second. Why does he look at me like that? For a second, I speculate on whether or not he has sensed my thoughts, but I quickly push the thought out of my mind. There's no way he could know what I really think of him - I never gave him any clues. He nods slowly.  
  
"Ok" he mutters, never breaking the eye contact between us.  
  
"Ok then" I whisper, not knowing quite what else to do. He's making me feel so uncomfortable.  
  
His expression is totally unreadable, and I wonder what's going on in his head. Realising that I've been staring for quite a while, I turn around quickly to walk away. I am determined not to look behind me, or I might just lose it completely. I was about two feet away when I hear my name being called softly. I halt, and slowly turn around to look at him. He has the same steady gaze, but this time, his eyes have something else in them. A small smile creeps onto his face.  
  
"Be careful".  
  
I stare at him for a good while, then smile back slightly in reply. I turn back towards the ocean, hoping I look a lot more confident than I feel.  
  
My mind races as I walk towards the sea. Maybe one day I'll find someone who I can love as much as did Brock. In time I'll forget. You can't stay in love with a person forever.....can you?  
  
Last night I fell.  
  
Now it's time to pick myself up.  
  



	2. What Goes Around, Comes Around

  
Authors Note: Well, this is chapter 2 up, and it's Brock's point of view. Sorry it took a while, but I've just finished my GCSE's. Ooh, scary! Anyway, I didn't really like how the last one turned out, but I think this is better.  
  
Disclaimer: Haven't I gone through this before? Well I don't own Pokemon. But I do own the evil martian demon who possessed me and made me write this!  
  
~~~  
  
I remember one Christmas when I was a little kid. My Mum took me down to the toy shop to do some Christmas shopping, but while she was looking at the price of some doll houses for my sisters, I wandered off. I used to love going to the toy shop. Everything was so big and new and shiny, and I strolled around the huge department store, not even caring that I was lost.   
And that's when I saw it.   
  
A shiny red bike stood on the platform, halting me from my little expedition. I was mesmerised. It was nothing special, and it wasn't top of the range. It didn't have 26 gears, it didn't even have a drinks holder. But I didn't want all those things. What I did want was the bike. I knew I had to have it. When my Mum finally found me, I remember gripping onto her leg tightly and begging for her to buy the bike. I wasn't a spoilt child, all children are naturally like that, wanting whatever they see. But I would do anything to have that bike. Mum told me it was too expensive, so I threw a huge tantrum on the shop floor. Finally, a compromise was made and that Christmas, I recieved a blue second-hand bike. I didn't like the bike that much, but I thought that if I used it enough, I'd start to like it as much as I did the red one, the one I really wanted. But I never did like that bike.   
  
It's ironic that that childhood memory should come back around, and now it's happening again. But this time it's not about bikes, it's about people. Girls, to be more specific. It seems most of my troubles always revolved around women, so why should it be any different now I'm 18? I mean, the woman leaning against me now is a nice girl. I mean, she's pretty....and she's really sweet too. But she's nothing special. Damn, that makes me sound like some sort of rat, doesn't it? Don't get me wrong, I really like the girl....she's great. But if it was under a different situation, I probably wouldn't look at her twice. I don't want you to think I'm some sort of two-faced dirtbag, but I'm ashamed to say that I AM using her as some sort of substitute.   
  
I'm not sure when exactly I stopped thinking of Misty as the little girl I travelled with, and started seeing her as....something else. Something more. It was so gradual, happened so slowly, that I didn't even notice. I don't remember just waking up one morning and thinking "Wow, I'm in love in Misty! Well, who would have thought?". I think the feeling just kind of crept up on me, and I started to realise over time. I dunno, maybe I've always known but denied it. Maybe I fell for her the first time I saw her. But it doesn't matter really, because she doesn't know.  
  
She's looking back at us now. I quickly lower my eyes so she doesn't see me looking at her, and I squeeze my arm tighter around Kara. I want to show Misty that I don't need her. I can be happy without her there. Why is this feeling of resentment building up inside me whenever she looks at me with Kara? It's like she's rubbing my face in the fact that I can never be with her, despite the fact she doesn't know. Doesn't know that I love her.   
  
There's been so many nights when it was just me and her, talking about anything and everything. It was those nights that I really felt like I was happy, and I could forget about training, or girls, or the problems of becoming an adult. I don't think I've connected with someone as well or as deeply than I have with her. It was also on those nights that I'd want to tell her how I felt so badly, but I could never say it. I'd gather all my courage, but it'd disappear as soon as I opened my mouth. Instead, I'd just watch her as she spoke. Not listening, just watching. And I'd vow to myself that I'd tell her the next time we talked together on a night like that. But I never did. I never told her. Maybe it was one of those nights that I fell for Misty.   
  
She's still looking back, and she has a weird kind of look on her face. I feel that frustrated anger rise up again, and I lean down to whisper in Kara's ear. She's playing with her hair, wrapping a bleached ringlet around her painted fingertip, giving me one of her saccherine sweet smiles.  
  
"I think you're the most gorgeous girl on this beach" I whisper. I know it's corny, so sue me. Over the years, I've learnt how to sweet talk. And Kara's just the sort of girl to fall for it. I'm lying of course, she doesn't hold a torch to Misty. But Misty never did fall for it when I used sweet talk to get myself out of trouble. I just got a whack around the head instead.   
  
Her cheeks go as pink as her nail polish as she blushes, and she giggles girlishly. She grasps my hand which I have around her shoulders, and leans in so that her lips are almost brushing my ear. I stop breathing for a second, unsure of what she's about to do. Some of her hair falls forward and tickles against my cheek. "And I've got the best boyfriend in the world" she whispers back. It sounds so corny I almost laugh out loud. I admit I feel a tinge of guilt when she says that, so I laugh in reply. I just hope it doesn't sound as forced as it is. It can't have sounded that strained because she's leaning against my chest, and she's started giggling again. She's a nice girl, but I can't stand girls who are all girly and pathetic. And I can't stand girls who giggle. I prefer them to laugh out loud if they find something funny like.....like Misty.....   
  
I wonder if Misty's still watching us. I wonder if *she* could see through my fake happiness. I look down at the top of Kara's head, then take a deep breath. Slowly, my eyes work their way up and become locked onto Misty's. I get the familiar feeling of my heart skipping a beat as my eyes meet hers, and I take a sharp intake of breath. She's looking not just at me, but at Kara too, and she has a look of intense dislike on her face. I agree, Kara and Misty aren't exactly a likely couple to make friends, but I've never seen Misty devolop such a dislike for someone she's barely said two words to. As she looks up at me, her eyes widen for a split second, and a blush starts to spread over face. Before I can say or do anything, she spins her head away, her long red hair flying out behind her as she does so. My heart sinks a little, but then I start to ponder on her reaction. Why did she turn away so fast, and why was she blushing? When our eyes met, she looked so embarrassed. But then, I suppose she's just embarrassed to be caught staring at somebody. For a second, there's a faint hope that she actually *did* like me, but I soon force the thought out of my mind. There's no way she could.   
  
I wait patiently for her to turn back again, but she doesn't. She just gazes out to sea, her back towards me. I feel the last few months of frustration and irritation build up in me again, and I glare at her back. Why am I doing all the running around? I don't need her! I have Kara....I guess.   
  
Anyway, back to the bike thing. You see, the reason that I'm getting a serious case of deja vu here is because Misty's kinda like the red bike which I wanted so badly but could never have. So beautiful and... and... mesmerising that it's like she has some kind of hold over me. But just like that red bike so many years ago, she can never be mine. Instead, all I can do is watch her from a distance. Watching, admiring, but never loving. Look, but don't touch. So instead, I get someone new. Someone I don't really love, but who takes my mind off Misty and how much it hurts. I keep telling myself that one day, I might learn to love Kara as much as I did Misty. As much as I still do. But I'm scared that I'll never be able to, just like when I was a kid.   
  
Why should I have to wait for her? I've waited for her for a long long time but what's the point? I can't wait forever. If she wasn't so wrapped up in her own little world, she would have noticed by now that I love her, that I always have and I always will. But she's so bloody naive! How can she not see?   
I don't need her! I don't need her at all.   
  
I know that I can't stay mad at her for long, and I feel my anger gradually disappearing. It's replaced by something even worse - sadness. I just wish that she'd get the message. If she could only see what's going on in my head right now, perhaps then she'd start to understand. But Misty's not a mind reader, and that's why she still doesn't know. She's just so... so... oblivious! The only way she'd ever realise would be for me to say it straight out, to her face. That or wear a ten foot neon sign saying "Misty, I love you". Neither of which I'm really willing to do.   
  
You see, the problem with her is that she never really thinks about things in-depth. She only sees what's on the surface, and rarely what's underneath. On somebody else, that would be called shallow. But on Misty, it's just naivety. She's wierd like that. She can be really mature one second, then so child-like the next. Just like she can be really sweet sometimes, but it just needs one thing for her to snap and totally lose it. I guess that's why I liked her so much in the first place. But it's also her wild unpredictability that keeps me at a distance. Besides, what would I do even if she realised? Just drop Kara like she was some kind of inconvienience and rush to Misty's side? Would I treat her like the way I've been treated by so many women before? These are questions I don't want to answer, and thinking about them is doing my head in.   
  
I watch as Ash approaches Misty and taps her lightly on the shoulder. Misty's head turns upwards to look at him, and I can see her face again as she raises her eyebrow, looking slightly annoyed. Ash crouches down to be level with her, his hand still on her shoulder, and says something. Misty's expression changes from an annoyed frown to an angry glare. She replies, her eyes narrowed. Ash gives her a strange look which seems to infuriate her even more. He talks again, but this time her face seems to soften and a small smile creeps onto her lips as she gives him a quick answer. This seems to have satisfied Ash, and he stands up, grinning. He says something as he slowly takes a few steps away, to which she mock glares at him. Ash continues, then stops and walks off, leaving me to wonder about the conversation that just took place. But as he does so, I catch sight of Misty's face. It's hard to describe her expression. It's like a mixture of lots of emotions. She looks thoughtful, but I can see a little sadness in there too. I wish I knew what he'd said.   
  
Her head suddenly twirls around and I find my eyes meeting hers again. She looks a little suprised to find me still looking over at her, and her eyes lower a little to look at Kara. She looks up again, and nervousness is written all over her face. She fiddles with the strap of her bikini top absent-mindedly, and bites her lip. I am just wondering what it is that's making her so anxious, when she smiles at me. It looks a little forced, but the smile grows into a grin, and she waves at me. I'm totally taken back, and it must be showing on my face pretty badly. That's the first smile Misty's given me in a long time, but I can still tell it's slightly strained. Awkwardly, I raise my own hand and wave awkwardly, feeling a little stupid. As she turns away, I realise I wasn't even smiling. She must think I'm so bloody miserable. She's got her back to me again, but I'm sure I can see her shoulders slump a little.   
  
I stare at Misty, confused. I'm totally thrown by all these mixed signals being sent from her. For the past day, she's not even spoke to me. Now she's waving and smiling like nothings happened. Somehow I get the feeling that the happy grins and cheerful waves are all just an act. But for what? And why?   
  
She sits still for a few seconds, then she shakes her head and lifts herself up. She turns towards me and puts her hand on her hips, giving me what appeared to be a confident smile.   
  
"Well, I'm going for a swim. I'll be back in a bit, ok?" she smiles.   
  
She looks happy, but there's something in her voice which would suggest otherwise. A slight waver as she speaks betrays how she's really feeling. Misty's not happy, I know that. But why she would lie to me about it, I don't know. I cotemplate this for a moment, and I stare her right in the eye, as if it could show me what she was thinking. She's getting more nervous and fidgety as I stare at her, trying to shrink into the background. That suprises me, Misty's never been someone who's intimidated easily.   
  
"Ok" I nod slowly.   
  
"Ok then" she whispers back, so quietly I can barely hear her. We hold this steady gaze for quite a while, neither of us knowing quite what to do. I wonder what's going on in her head right now. I expect her to say something more, but instead she turns around quickly and starts to walk away. Watching her, I say her name quietly. She must have heard me, because she's turning back around again. I smile slightly at her, this time properly. All this tension between us is stupid. I realise how much I miss her and how much I miss just me and her acting like best friends, like we always have.   
  
"Be careful" I say quietly.   
  
She stares at me, her face an expressionless mask. A smile forms on her lips, but this time it's not fake. It's a real smile, one which I haven't seen in such a long time. It's the same smile that she gave me when it was just me, her and Ash, and it's not an overly sweet smile like Kara's. It's just *her* smile, the one which I love. She walks away without answering me, but she really doesn't need to.   
  
I know I'll never be able to love Kara the way I do Misty, and I'd be lying to myself if I say I did. I guess it's always going to be there, but it might fade in time, like a scar that'll heal but will never leave completely.   
  
Maybe one day she'll know. Just maybe.   
  
~~~  
  
Authors Note: Well, there it is. Stay tuned for the... erm... dramatic conclusion. Go on, you know you want to... ;-p 


	3. Conclusion

  
Why Can't You See? - chapter 3  
  
Authors Note: Looky here, I added a final chapter! Yippee! I really *hate* it when fanfics are left and insert name here and insert other name here never actually get together, so I just thought "ah, what the hell?". It's actually written in the third person this time, plus, I actually added FLUFF into it. That's right, it has fluff!  
  
***   
  
  
Misty shivered slightly, as the chill in the air bit through her thin jacket. Her eyes lowered to the uneven ground beneath her feet, and she walked slowly forward, paying little attention to her surroundings. To any casual observer, she appeared to be just another young girl in her middle to late teens, taking a short walk along the beach. Misty's eyes roamed the length of the beach stretched in front of her, but she stared vacantly, her mind elsewhere.   
  
~~~  
  
Day after day  
Time passed away  
And I just can't get you out my mind  
Nobody knows  
I hide it inside  
I keep on searching but I just can't find  
  
~~~  
  
How long has it been since she'd spoken to him? She missed him immensly, but couldn't stand to speak to him for fear of making the situation worse. It was tough, constantly searching for ways to avoid him, but somehow she had gotten through. Over the past three days, not a word had been spoken between them. Despite her vow to forget about her feelings towards Brock and to continue as they always had before, it was if they'd made a silent pact to avoid each other like the plague. She wasn't really that suprised if he *was* ignoring her. She had been a total bitch over the past few days, and she hadn't tried very hard to disguise her dislike - no, *hate* - for Kara, the woman he spent every waking hour with.   
  
"Why does he even bother with me?" she whispered to herself, scuffling the toe of her trainer across the sand. The weather had taken a turn for the worse since that sweltering day at the beach, and the true September weather was finally settling in. Shoving her hands into her jeans pocket, she drew a deep breath of sea air. She felt a pang of home-sickness as she did so, and for the first time, she started to consider returning home.   
  
'It would be a lot easier' she thought to herself, turning her head sidewards to look at the waves crashing on the shore. At least at home she had family, who never judged her and gave her unconditional love. Unlike Brock.   
  
Misty clamped her eyes shut and shook her head vigorously. Why did her train of thought always return back to him? For the past few days, her mind had been in turmoil over him. He was the last thing she thought about when she went to sleep, and the first thing when she woke up. She felt like one of those pathetic women she read about in books, the 'tragic heroine' who spends years agonising over an unobtainable man. Misty had had many boyfriends before, but she was relatively new to the whole 'love' concept. How was it possible to have such strong feelings about a person who didn't return them?  
  
~~~  
  
The courage to show to let you know  
I've never felt love like this before  
  
And once again I'm thinking about  
Taking the easy way out  
  
~~~  
  
A sudden breeze blew from the sea, blowing some strands of long red hair into her mouth. Misty angrily wiped the unruly wisps away from her face and tucked them behind her ear. She hated herself for not going on with her life. For not getting over Brock. For still feeling that undescribable feeling of jealously whenever Brock and Kara so much as looked at each other. There were many times that Misty felt on the edge of tears, but she refused to let herself cry. Even now, she could feel tears prick the back of her eyelids, but she would not let them show. She knew no one would ever know should she choose to cry, but she had grown up to believe that she had to be tough, and that tears were weak. Old habits die hard.   
  
Misty's solitude was broken as her shoulder forcefully connected with something warm and solid, and she was thrown back a few feet. Staggering to keep her balance, she waited a few seconds to get her bearings.   
  
"Hey, why don't you watch where you're going, you....". Misty's ranting was cut short as she instantly recognised the face staring back at her.   
  
"Oh. It's...you" she said in a flat tone, putting her hands back in her pockets. Brock's expression, which at first was one of sympathy, changed as he saw who he had knocked over, to match her uninterested one.   
  
"Yeah. Hi".   
  
"Hi" Misty replied, looking down uncomfortably at the floor. A few seconds silence passed, both standing and looking at each other awkwardly. The tension-fuelled silence was soon too much for Misty to bear. "Well....gotta run" she shrugged, moving to walk past Brock.   
  
He let out a sigh, and stuck his hands in his pockets. "Misty, we've got to talk" he said firmly, stopping Misty in her tracks. Misty just shrugged her shoulders again in reply. "Nothing to talk about" she answered casually, moving to step forward again. This time, Brock grabbed hold of her arm. Misty halted and glared at Brock.   
  
"Yes there is. Let's just take a walk. Please?" he asked quietly, a pleading tone creeping into his voice. Misty looked ready to snap back again, but reluctantly nodded her head in reply. Brock managed a weak smile and loosened his grip around her arm. "Good. It's..... a start" he muttered, taking his hand away and replacing it in pocket.   
  
~~~  
  
But if I let you go I will never know  
What my life would be holding you close to me  
Will I ever see you smiling back at me  
How will I know  
If I let you go  
  
~~~  
  
The two started to walk slowly across the sand, walking close together but still keeping a foot long gap between them. For a while, neither said anything, and a heavy silence hung between them. The tense atmosphere between the two was becoming almost unbearable to Brock, so he made the first attempt to strike up a conversation. "So," he said lightly. "How are you doing?".   
  
The words sounded alien coming from his mouth, even to his own ears. For years, he had spent nearly every waking hour around Misty, now here he was speaking to his best friend as if she were a stranger. Misty glanced up at him warily, the same thoughts obviously going through her head.   
  
~~~  
  
Night after night I hear myself say  
Why can't this feeling just fade away  
There's no-one like you  
You speak to my heart  
It's such a shame we're worlds apart  
  
~~~  
  
"I'm... I'm good. And you?" she asked, hating how they sounded like two strangers having a polite conversation. "Oh, I'm ok" Brock shrugged, raising his eyes to the sky. "And where is Kara?" Misty asked, an edge of bitterness in her voice. Brock lowered to his eyes to the ground, suprised at the unwanted feeling of guilt that was suddenly overwhelming him. "She's back at the hotel. We're not joined at the hip, you know" he muttered. Misty raised her eyebrows. "Could have fooled me" she said quietly, instantly regretting it afterwards. Brock glanced over at her questioningly.   
  
"Look Misty, what's going on?" he demanded, narrowing his eyes. Misty glared at him defensively. "I don't know what you're talking about" she lied. "I'm talking about us, Misty" Brock frowned, his patience wearing thin. Misty looked up at him in suprise.   
  
"I mean, this time last week we were best friends. What happened?" he asked, his voice softening. Misty gave a defeated sigh and shook her head. 'Kara happened' she thought to herself, but instead chose to say, "I don't know". Brock was silent for a second, before biting his lip nervously. "Is it anything to do with Kara?" he asked quietly.   
  
Misty's eyes flew to his face in shock. "Um...no. No, of course not" Misty quickly protested, shaking her head rapidly. "It is, isn't it?" Brock sighed, shaking his head. Misty turned her eyes away, realising that denying it wasn't fooling Brock at all. "Why? What is it you hate so much about her?" Brock demanded, his face clearly showing the confusion he was feeling. Misty looked him shamefully in the face, and rubbed the back of her neck uncomfortably. "You wouldn't understand" she murmered quietly, yet loud enough for Brock to hear. "I would! I would understand! Just tell me what's wrong!" he asked angrily, clutching her arm.   
  
~~~  
  
I'm too shy to ask, I'm too proud to lose  
But sooner or later I gotta chose  
  
And once again I'm thinking about  
Taking the easy way out  
  
~~~  
  
Misty pushed him back angrily, not forceful enough for it to hurt, but enough for her to get her point across. "No!" she yelled, backing away from him. "You have no idea what's wrong because you obviously don't care about anyone but yourself and your bitch of a girlfriend! Ever since she came along, you've changed! You don't even notice Ash or I are alive and it's like you're like a totally different person! And I don't like what you've become!".   
  
Brock looked at her oddly, before shooting her a venomous look. "What are you talking about, Misty?" he shouted, gesturing wildly with his arms. "I am exactly who I was before! You think I've changed just because I've got a new girlfriend???". Misty glared at him angrily, but didn't shout back. "You have to me" she spat, her voice quiet. "And I want the old Brock back. My Brock".   
  
Brock's face softened, and he lowered his arms to his sides. "I am the old Brock, Misty. But all I want to know is what's going on here. We don't speak anymore, we don't do stuff anymore....it's like we've become strangers. What happened, Misty? I thought we were best friends....".   
  
"We were! I mean, we are!" Misty stammered. "Are we? Because it doesn't feel like it anymore. I used to be able to talk to you about anything. Now I have trouble keeping up a five minute conversation with you" Brock sighed. Misty glanced at his face, then drew in a deep breath. "Maybe you're right, Brock. I guess there is a lot to talk about" she said, lowering her voice. "Let's sit down". Brock nodded, and followed Misty to the steps leading up off the beach.   
  
~~~  
  
But if I let you go I will never know  
What my life would be holding you close to me  
Will I ever see you smiling back at me  
How will I know  
If I let you go  
  
~~~  
  
Misty silently sat on the third step, her feet resting on the sandy bottom step. Brock sat beside her, resting his arms along his legs. "So..." Misty started, prompting Brock to re-start the conversation. "So..." Brock replied, unable to think of what to say. "...uh...where should we begin?" Misty joked feebly, wringing her hands together in front of her. "Well, we could start with you explaining why you've been avoiding me..." Brock prompted, turning to look at her. Misty smiled weakly. "I was afraid you'd say that". Brock half-smiled, and waited patiently for her to speak.   
  
"Well, I guess there's no point in lying. Half the reason I've been avoiding of you is because of.... Kara" she admitted guiltily. Brock nodded slowly. "I thought as much".   
  
"It's not like I have anything against the girl personally," Misty continued. "It's just that.... Oh God, this is going to sound so stupid".   
  
"It's ok, go ahead" Brock gently persisted.   
  
"Well," Misty explained nervously. "It's just that I... I have trouble accepting her. I mean, I was so used to the way things were that I didn't like it when it all changed. We never do stuff like we used to anymore, because you're always too busy doing something with Kara. It's like you have no time for me anymore, and I guess... I just feel like she's taken you away from me. And Ash too". Brock listened intently as she said this, before sighing deeply and shaking his head.   
  
"Well, I... I don't know what to say. I had no idea how you felt about this". Misty put her hand to her forehead. "I know, I know, it's stupid!" she moaned. "No it's not, it's just... have I really been ignoring you?" he asked disbelievingly. Misty rolled her eyes. "Brock, you've been ignoring everyone; me, Ash.... you don't even flirt with other women now".   
  
"I'm sorry" Brock muttered. "I guess I've just had a lot on my mind recently".   
  
~~~  
  
If I let you go, baby  
Once again I'm thinking about  
Taking the easy way out  
  
~~~  
  
Misty glanced over at him questioningly, but chose not to pursue the matter. "Look Brock, now that we've cleared the air, maybe it's time we started getting back to normal" she offered, managing a small grin in his direction. "So... you want to be friends again?" Brock asked, a smile creeping onto his face. "Yeah, I do. I've really missed you" Misty smiled, getting onto her feet. She held her hand out to Brock, which he took to pull himself him. "Yeah, so have I" Brock smiled, still gripping onto her hand. "But there's one thing that still bothers me...".   
  
"What's that?" Misty asked. "Well, when you were talking about how things had changed..." he said, frowning slightly. "You said that was only half the reason. That means there's something else you haven't told me".   
  
Misty looked at him silently for a minute, before lowering her eyes to the ground. "Well... uh... I can't say" she said quickly, avoiding his gaze. "Please? Just tell me. We're friends, right? Friends have no secrets" Brock shrugged, tilting her head to one side.   
  
~~~  
  
But if I let you go I will never know  
What my life would be holding you close to me  
Will I ever see you smiling back at me  
How will I know  
If I let you go  
  
~~~  
  
Misty looked at him wearily, before sighing in defeat. "Fine, you want to know? I'll tell you, but don't tell me I didn't warn you". She drew in a deep breath and glued her eyes to the floor. "The reason I hate Kara is because... I...". She clamped her eyes shut. "Because I guess you could say I'm.... jealous... of her". Brock looked at Misty, puzzled. "Why? It's not as if she's prettier than you or anything". Misty gave an exasperated sigh. "No, I don't think you quite understand, Brock. I'm jealous of her because of her boyfriend" she persisted. "Don't worry, you'll get a boyfriend one day, Misty" Brock smiled cheerfully, patting her on the shoulder reassuringly.   
  
Misty shook her head in disbelief. "Have you just got become dense as you got older, or are you spending too long around Ash?" she yelled. "Why can't you see, Brock? I'm jealous of her because of *who* her boyfriend is!".   
  
Brock's eyes widened. "Oh. So... you..."   
  
"Yes. I do..." she said quietly. Brock stood motionless for a second as various emotions flitted across his face. Misty stood for what seemed like an eternity, her eyes fixed on Brock's face.   
  
"You know, it would be nice if you said something right about now" she joked weakly, although there was a deadly serious tone beneath her attempted humour. Brock shook his head to bring himself back to reality, and opened his mouth in an attempt to answer. But he found himself completely speechless. Looking at Misty's increasingly anxious face, he realised that he had to give an answer in some form before she got upset. Misty meanwhile, had taken his silence as a form of rejection. She shook her head sadly, yet smiled weakly to try and cover her disappointment.   
  
"I... I understand Brock. You've got Kara, and it was wrong of me to ever ask you when you're so obviously happy with another girl. I hope we can still be friends, just like we were before. In fact, let's pretend this never happen-"   
  
She was cut off as Brock pressed his lips against hers, silencing her mid-sentence. Misty froze rigidly in shock for a second, then slowly relaxed and closed her eyes, letting herself be drawn into the kiss. Seeing it as a sign of encouragement, Brock slipped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer.   
  
~~~  
  
But if I let you go I will never know  
Will I ever see you smiling back at me  
How will I know  
If I let you go  
  
~~~  
  
As Misty wrapped her arms around his neck and the two continued to embrace, neither noticed a girl with platinum blond hair turn around and run, tears streaming down her face.  
  
  
***  
  
Authors Note: Well... there it is. I haven't wrote a fanfic where they do they actually do the kissy-kissy thing, so... uh... forgive me if it wasn't great. Heh heh ^_^   



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